I have been watching social media as people are responding to the recent uptick of violent sexual rhetoric targeting women (and everyone, really) from former President Donald Trump and those from his inner circle. This aspect of the Trump campaign seems to be the most difficult for people to engage with, and rightly so.
We have not unlearned enough or practiced heathy sexual ethics enough to know how to deal with a leader sexually harassing a nation. Mostly we are just retraumatized.
Julia Goldie Day
In an interview with Tucker Carlson on Thursday, just days before Election Day, the former president said this about Republican Liz Cheney, who served as vice chair of the January 6 Committee and has endorsed Vice President Kamala Harris for president: “She’s a radical war hawk. Let’s put her with a rifle standing there with nine barrels shooting at her, OK? Let’s see how she feels about it, you know, when the guns are trained on her face.”
Tucker Carlson himself made the following sexually violent comments a week earlier to a cheering Trump rally crowd: “There has to be a point at which Dad comes home,” he said, to full-throated cheers from the crowd. “Dad comes home and he’s pissed. He’s not vengeful, he loves his children. Disobedient as they may be, he loves them, because they’re his children. … And when Dad gets home, you know what he says? You’ve been a bad girl. You’ve been a bad little girl and you’re getting a vigorous spanking right now. And no, it’s not going to hurt me more than it hurts you. No, it’s not. I’m not going to lie. It’s going to hurt you a lot more than it hurts me. And you earned this. You’re getting a vigorous spanking because you’ve been a bad girl, and it has to be this way.”
Then as Trump comes to the stage, the crowd yells “Daddy’s home!”
On TikTok, brand-new 18-year-old voters are being introduced to the Access Hollywood tape in which Trump brags on video of “grabbing women by the pussy” and just kissing them without consent, saying they “let you do it” when you’re a star. When the disturbing video was leaked prior to the 2016 election, these first-time voters were too young to be exposed to the explicit content.
Now, many videos show the absolute disturbed shock on their young faces.
The National Sexual Violence Resource Center says 81% of women and 43% of men have experienced some form of sexual harassment or assault in their lifetime. That’s from a study in 2018. I would guess the percentage is much higher in 2024.
“We must understand many of us are traumatized by sexual violence.”
The statistics from 2018 do not account for unreported harassment and assault although many experts have estimated the numbers are far higher than reported. We must understand many of us are traumatized by sexual violence.
Trump’s recent promise to protect women even if they don’t want his protection communicates he fails to understand these key facts. He says on stage he has been cautioned from saying this to women, but he says he doesn’t care. It is the very definition of misogyny: to keep women afraid and less powerful than men and in need of protection. This power dynamic serves his purposes.
Karen Pontius says in response, “The bottom line is, women do not want nor are we asking for men to protect us. We’re asking for men to stop being the thing we need protection from. I can’t make it any clearer.”
Trump is not listening to women and others when being offered this critique.
In fact, Trump doubled down by miming a performance of oral sex when frustrated with a mic stand on stage, to the delight of his crowd.
When we see this kind of harassment coupled with the knowledge of the former president’s known behavior — this coming from an adjudicated rapist no less — we see how abuse of power and sex so often work closely together. This abuse of power and sexuality is on full display as the former president feels the indictment of the American people dawning.
It might be he has seen one of the newest ads for the Harris-Walz campaign featuring the voice of Julia Roberts telling women the ballot box is the one place women still have the right to choose even if their husbands are voting for Trump. The “Your Vote, Your Choice” ad targets women because the growing gender gap in the polls indicates even more conservative white women may be unwilling to vote for Trump.
I must say I have immense empathy for those who have been convinced this is the way a strong Bible-believing man behaves, the so-called head of a family holding it together with understood fear and violence, even sexual violence. You are being intimidated into submission; fear holds you into place, giving you a false sense of protection and safety. The power these men and men like them hold is undeniable.
“The threat of violence or assault is justified in the patriarchal hierarchical system.”
The threat of violence or assault is justified in the patriarchal hierarchical system, and Trump and Carlson are saying the quiet parts out loud. This is how abusive power works, and it’s no wonder it’s hard to escape.
We know this is why so many are abused in traditional evangelical church settings. The hierarchy itself serves up those with less power to those at the top. Trump and Carlson and others like them are only repeating a pattern they know works, sexually harassing a nation into another presidential term that will test the limits of democracy.
The question is, once we see it, will we allow it? And if we can vote him into submission, how will we heal from this harassment?
Julia Goldie Day is an ordained minister within the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship and lives in Memphis, Tenn. She is a painter and proud mother to Jasper, Barak and Jillian. Learn more at her website or follow her on socials @JuliaGoldieDay.
Related articles:
Tucker Carlson is a danger to American families | Opinion by Mark Wingfield
69 women have accused Trump of sexual misconduct but he’s changed the definition
Denial of Trump’s abusive behavior has ‘devastating implications,’ Russell Moore says
Letter to the Editor: A vote for Trump is a vote for a rapist