It is incredible what God can and will do with your life when you completely open your heart to him. For many years even though I considered myself a Christian I never allowed God to have complete control. Our God is an awesome God when we allow him room in our life. God is guiding my wife and me through the most life changing event we have ever experienced.
Both Pat and I were brought up in farm families of seven children each. Pat grew up on a dairy farm in West Virginia, and I grew up on a farm with cattle, orchards, and a nursery in Central Virginia. As children both of us were expected to be at church on Sunday, attend Bible school during the summer and be “good” kids. Working on the farm was a must and not an option.
Robert and Pat Saunders with their children (l to r) Victoria, Annie, Patrick, Price and Alex.
Pat and I met at Virginia Tech in the fall of 1984. We were married in the summer of 1987, one week after Pat's graduation. After several years, we decided we were ready to begin a family. We both wanted a large family. Only later did we realize that fertility problems would make that very difficult. Month after month of tests, waiting and being disappointed, and seeing other couples having children began to take a major toll on us.
Dealing with infertility is emotionally and physically stressful. The frustration forced us to explore adoption as a means of having children. Unexpectedly, God finally blessed us with our daughter, Annie, in the winter of 1993, just as we were ready to accept the fact that biological children were not an option. After Annie's birth and multiple subsequent pregnancy problems later, we were blessed with two boys, Price and Patrick, in 1998 and 1999.
Then, although we wanted more children, we were unwilling to go through the toils of fertility clinics and other medical issues. We decided to simply stop attempting to have other children. However, because neither of us could completely ignore our desire for more children, we found ourselves frequently discussing adoption.
During the winter of 2005, Pat and I both came to believe that God had adoption plans for us. At that point we began to attend meetings, read and pray about enlarging our family in this way. We talked to friends who had adopted both domestically and internationally, and we talked to our children. Annie gave immediate approval to the idea and even wanted to become involved with us in the process. The boys were fine with the possibility even though we questioned if they fully comprehended what was happening. After much thought and prayer, we decided that we wanted to further explore international adoption.
We decided that Eastern Europe would be our target area, and signed on with a small agency from Iowa specializing in adoptions there. After filling out mountains of paperwork and telling the agencies more about us than even our own mothers knew, we were approved to travel and meet children. In July of 2006, we left for Russia to meet two girls and to decide if we were interested in adopting one or both of them. We flew to Moscow, then on to the city of Stavropol in southern Russia. Stavropol is between the Black Sea and the Caspian Sea, very close to the Caucasus Mountains. First we met Alexandra, 12 years old, at a “children's hospital.” We fell in love with her within minutes. Soon after, she was moved back to the nearby children's home of Nadeshda. After spending three days with Alex, we traveled about 150 miles to the small town of Zelenokumsk. The children's home there was in very sad condition, and the children lived with a sense of hopelessness. We met Victoria, a very shy, quiet 5 year old. After spending several days with Victoria it was clear that we were being led to adopt her also. We went to the Russian officials and petitioned the court to allow us to adopt both of the girls. We returned home to complete more paperwork and await a call to return.
The situation in Russian children's homes is very sad. Many of the children have been taken from their families due to the parents being unable to care for them. It is estimated that there are over 700,000 children in these homes throughout Russia. Children over the age of 5 face a very grim reality: they have only about a 5 percent chance of being adopted. The other 95 percent are turned out of the homes between the ages of 16 and 18, in many cases having no home, no job and no support system. Many resort to crime, prostitution or suicide. During 2006, there were approximately 21,000 international adoptions into the United States, nearly 4,000 from Russia.
Finally in mid-November, we received the call telling us that our court date had been set. We would return to Russia in mid-December and expect to stay through Christmas, hopefully returning to the U.S. just before the New Year. The timing of traveling around the holiday was God's hand at work. Even though we would be gone over the Christmas holiday, we would be able to take our daughter Annie with us, letting her see firsthand where her sisters were coming from. Also, the three weeks around Christmas are the slowest time of the year for my business. Our boys were delighted to be able to spend 20 days visiting various uncles, aunts and grandparents.
On Dec. 11, we arrived back in Stavropol after nearly 30 hours of traveling. We visited the girls, neither of whom spoke a word of English, and prepared for the adoption hearing. After the court appearance, we were asked to wait in Russia 10 more days for an appeal period to expire. During this time, we met many families from all over the United States and several foreign countries, all of whom were on journeys of faith that were taking them to the same small town in southern Russia, wanting to share God's love with others by adopting. We met families adopting their first child, families adopting their second or third child, and families like us with biological children, who were adopting children, some for the second or third time.
The 10-day appeal period seemed very long. Sitting in a foreign country where almost no one spoke English was agonizing. We did find an internet café that we used to keep in touch with home and our support group from the church and community. On Christmas Eve, I was attempting to type an email. Annie was with me and she could see that I was shedding tears as I as trying to think of something to say to everyone for Christmas. She said “Dad, just write ‘God is good!' ” I was so emotionally charged from the entire adoption process and missing our boys at home. To have my 13-year-old daughter witness to me in that small way was awesome. The trip thus far had been very wearisome to me. But Annie's simple declaration reminding me of God's goodness recharged and refocused my spirit. It overwhelmed me. I realized the only way we would finish the adoption and get back home was to turn it completely back over to God. I began to regularly pray, “God help me, because you are good.” I knew God had brought me this far and He would not let me down.
On Dec. 29, Annie, Pat, and I returned home with two new American citizens in tow. Our two boys and my parents met us at the airport in Richmond. The boys were delighted to meet their new sisters. Our family, church, and community have been so eager to meet and learn more about the girls. The girls have been overwhelmed with the size of their new family.
However, since returning home the journey has not been an easy one. Family adjustments could not have been made without God's help. Some nights we find ourselves praying simply, “God help us be strong.” Healing the scars of the girls' pasts will take time. Hopefully, many of the bad memories will be forgotten.
The temptation of Jesus in Luke tells us: “When the devil had finished every test, he departed from him until an opportune time” (4:13, NRSV). If Jesus' temptation did not end after the 40-day wilderness experience, then we should expect no less. From time to time, Satan gives us thoughts of doubt, fear and panic. With God's help every day, we choose to follow the leading of Jesus Christ.
We often think of what it is going to be like to travel from life here on the earth to our eternal life in heaven. Alex and Victoria have already made the first leg of that journey. To be living in a children's home in Russia one week, then living in America the next is and was inconceivable to them, just as the beauty of heaven is inconceivable to us. The other night they commented that they never had cake in Russia, and ice cream, oranges, bananas and apples were only occasional Christmas gifts. Children in these homes understand that their primary hope lies in adoption to America or Europe. All their friends asked as they left, “Please write and tell us what it is like in America.”
Many people say that we have done a great thing for these girls. But, by coming here the girls have done great things for our family, our church and our community.