Shannon Ethridge thinks too many Christians believe: “Sex is the most scandalous, sinful, shameful thing in the world. So, be sure to save it for someone you love.”
Many Christians develop that attitude toward sex due not only to what they have learned at home, but also from what preachers and Sunday school teachers have told them, she insisted.
“It’s time for churches to have more open conversations about sex,” said Ethridge, the author of the Every Woman’s Battle series.
“It’s time for churches to have more open conversations about sex,” says Shannon Ethridge.
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Too many churches fear addressing issues related to human sexuality because ministers fear offending older members — fears she believes are unfounded. Senior adults know society has become more overtly sexualized than when they were young, and many of them know their children and grandchildren need a place where issues about sex are explored honestly in a Christian context, she said.
“They know the world has changed, and they know the church has not changed with it,” said Ethridge, a member of a Baptist church in Tyler, Texas.
Churches create a climate where married couples find sexual fulfillment when spiritual leaders honestly address questions and concerns about sexuality, she insisted. That may include a sermon series about sex, small-group studies of Christian books about sexuality and marriage mentors.
“There need to be the kind of relationships that develop in church where people feel free to talk about these issues. When they do, members will not feel like, ‘I’m the only one,’” she said.
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In her most recent book, The Passion Principles: Celebrating Sexual Freedom in Marriage, Ethridge urges Christians to recognize the spiritual, mental, emotional and physical aspects of sex as God’s gift to married couples.
“We are spiritual beings, and we are sexual beings. The spiritual and the sexual are two sides of the same coin. They are something we all have in common,” she said. “And they are not juxtaposed. They are not the antithesis of each other.”
Ethridge believes the Bible prohibits sexual intimacy outside marriage, but she advocates “sexual freedom” within marriage. In her view, little should be considered off-limits in the marital bedroom if both a husband and wife find it fulfilling, and it enhances their intimacy, unless Scripture specifically prohibits it.
Marriage offers a picture of the passionate devotion and intimate love Christ has toward his bride, the church, she insisted. So, marriages on Earth should reflect that same passion and intimacy.
“God created us with a craving to be intimate with another human being. A married couple is really never more God-like than when making love in a marriage bed,” she said.
Ken Camp ([email protected]) is managing editor of the Baptist Standard.