Moving Through Prayer & Dialogue to Decisions in Church
Far too many churches are stuck these days by an inability to make decisions about matters that can move them forward in faith and function. I see at least Five Practices That Keep Churches Stuck –
- Recycling inward focused leaders;
- Investing in the present more than the future;
- Failure to create incubators to grow fresh faith and new leaders;
- Over dependency on pastoral leadership that overshadows the ministry of membership;
- Ritualized prayers and practices rather than fresh encounters with the Spirit
Each challenge is filled with opportunities. To get to the opportunities, decisions have to be made… right decisions are difficult but essential. No decision is a decision that can be and often is fatal to a church’s future. Decisions are difficult at times (particularly in church). However, it is clear that to move into one’s divine destiny, tough decisions are often called for and have to be made. It is also clear that they are not always embraced by everyone that is affected, however, they still have to be made to move the mission of God forward. Consider Noah, Abraham, Jonah, Moses and Joshua and many others in the Old Testament. In the New Testament we see Mary and Joseph’s struggle with making decisions in challenging times; then Paul and Barnabas, Stephen and the list goes on and on and on. Then there are those church situations in Acts – conflicting opinions of leaders, challenges over persons being neglected and others seemingly preferred and how to honor traditions while moving forward. Scripture is clear, progress is rarely experienced without a challenging decision guided by the best prayer, faith and action at a given time. Without decision, destiny is often missed or sabotaged, in order to preserve comfort; or when one is not filled with enough faith to step into the unknown and trust the Spirit’s leading to go to ‘a place we know not of’.
After working in and consulting with churches over 35 years, I have seen many leaders and congregations who miss their divine destiny, i.e. God’s best plan for them, because they were not willing to make decisions. They covered up or avoided the difficulty by ‘praying about it’, ‘talking it to death’ over and over again, through an array of leadership groups, families, classes and town or congregational meetings. More often than not, through this maze of conversations, the decision gets watered down or lost, in order to keep everyone happy and giving. Too often the window for decision making is postponed or ignored and then the window for decision making closes fast and adds pressure to the situation. I am not suggesting dictatorial leadership, nor am I suggesting that we not have prayer meetings and focused congregational conversations. All of this is important and essential to healthy decision making. Coaching has helped me learn to invite persons to consider five guiding principles for moving decision making forward in church life….
- Prayerfully communicate clearly, and in multiple venues, the bottom line decision that needs to be made and what drives the need for decision now.
- Put a realistic time frame on all dialogues, prayer times and decision making. A gathering without an end time only serves to complicate the conversation and often polarize the group
- Plan several focused dialogues that values everyone’s voice and perspective. Work hard to engage every voice and provide the best venue for them to be heard. Ask, ‘what do you need to know to make a decision?’; ‘What do you need us to know that you do not feel we know now?’
- Create a safe and sacred space for every voice to be welcome and valued. Ask, ‘what response do you need from individuals or groups to help you make a decision?” It’s not about judging their voice as much as hearing their voice clearly, without judgment.
- Ask questions to ensure people feel heard exploring together: ‘What are the benefits & challenges if we act on your suggestion?’; How will your suggestion impact the mission of the church? How would your suggestion impact your children, grandchildren or peers? How do these decisions/issues need to be prioritized to have the greatest impact on Kingdom issues now?
Churches are facing serious issues these days and most, if not all, call for difficult decisions. Delaying the decision only complicates most of the issues most of the time. Some decisions that are determining destiny of many churches relates to one or more of the following issues:
- Financial issues
- Building maintenance or use of facilities
- Demographic shifts in the community that challenge current membership
- Staffing issues related to financial stress, tenure, competence or need to realign or redefine responsibilities, benefits, and work status
- Aligning budget and mission to divine calling
- Definition and use of mission money – community, state, global
- Declining attendance, morale and lack of participation in church
- Aging leadership and giving base
- Need for updating the use of technology
- Generational preferences that impact worship, giving, and faith formation
Too often a failure to make a decision is a vote to die or continue a downward spiral of impact and mission.