Evidence from this week provides three reasons why the work of Baptist Women in Ministry is still needed.
Reason No. 1: When Christian patriarchal theology is popularized and easily accessible, it is used for harm.
Meredith Stone
Reporting by Daniel Silliman at The Roys Report explained how Jeffrey Epstein used an article by James Dobson to perpetuate abuse.
In a 2019 text exchange included in the recently released Epstein Files, a woman sought advice from Epstein about her relationship with her father.
Epstein replied, “Ask yourself why you are so mad at him” and then included a link to a column from Dobson. The article told another woman whose father had caused her family deep pain that she needed to simply change her perspective and accept that her father cannot perceive her feelings.
Epstein followed up with an admonition that the woman needed to learn to give, be grateful and offer him sexual favors as appreciation for the advice.
This text exchange raises all manner of questions: How did Epstein know about James Dobson’s work? Was he a fan of Dobson? Did Epstein consider himself Christian and thus use popularized versions of patriarchal theology, like Dobson’s, to justify his lifestyle?
When harmful theology is popularized, it becomes accessible and is utilized as spiritual abuse so that abusers can justify the emotional, physical, and sexual abuse they cause.
Therefore, a different kind of theology needs to be popularized. We need to make accessible a theology that promotes the thriving, well-being and wholeness of everyone, as well as a belief system that explains why God does not enable, support or desire harm to any person.
“If someone who is abusing people can use your theology to support their harmful actions, it is time to reexamine your theology.”
When a theology that promotes flourishing is popularized instead of one that enables abuse, ideological culture is permeated with goodness instead of evil. Hopefully then our society’s culture will also be permeated with goodness instead of evil.
Also, I believe it is safe to say if someone who is abusing people can use your theology to support their harmful actions, it is time to reexamine your theology.
Reason No. 2: When women are forced to publicly endure sexist acts from the top leader of our country, people assume such behavior is acceptable.
This week, President Donald Trump scolded CNN correspondent Kaitlan Collins for not smiling instead of answering a question she asked about Epstein’s sexual assault victims.
Telling women they need to smile more is a pervasive form of sexism and gender bias that diminishes women’s work and worth. Has a male journalist ever been told he needed to smile more to be a good journalist, or to simply be a good man?
Katilan Collins
Pressuring women to have an amiable countenance perpetuates gender constructions that say to be a good woman you must be happy, kind, humble and submissive.
Professional women must be serious and assertive in order to be successful, as all people must be serious and assertive from time to time. Yet when women exert these qualities, they are perceived negatively because of reinforced constructions of gender that diminish women’s value.
The church must educate people that this kind of treatment of women is not consistent with being a disciple of Jesus. Followers of Jesus keep his command that we love our neighbor as ourselves. Insulting women that they do not have enough worth to be serious without being scolded to smile is not loving one’s neighbor as oneself.
When the church engages in this kind of education it needs to bring awareness to all the subtle and not-so-subtle forms of sexism that are pervasive both in the world and in our own congregations.
“I can testify that Kaitlan Collins is not alone in being told that she needs to smile more to be effective in her job.”
If the church does not provide education on gender equality, then whatever mindset is most accessible in the world will dominate.
As a keeper of stories from many women in ministry, I can testify that Kaitlan Collins is not alone in being told that she needs to smile more to be effective in her job.
As an important aside, though, if women do choose to smile often, especially when doing hard things, as a way of negotiating their patriarchal environments, we must support their agency in making their own choices of how they negotiate. Taking away women’s agency to choose their own behavior and actions is the exact oppression we are working against.
We must present our congregants an alternative way of behaving than what they see modeled by the current president of the United States. We must do the work of discipling Jesus instructed in the Great Commandment. Providing education on gender equality is a form of that very work of discipleship.
Reason No. 3: All these things happen often in moderate and progressive environments too.
This week I received a communication from someone in a progressive Baptist environment that addressed me as “Miss” while referring to a male on the email thread as “Dr.” (I am ordained and have a PhD, two titles that are present in my email signature). In the same email, a generalization was made about how women minister best.
I do not believe this person was consciously diminishing me or women. I believe this person does support women in ministry and believes women are equal to men. But I also believe patriarchy and sexism are so embedded in our culture that bias is acted upon unconsciously.
“When titles are used inconsistently for men and women when they have the same credentials, it is a sign of bias and of disrespect.”
I also do not believe titles are the only or best way to show someone respect and I have been known to ask people to call me by my first name. But when titles are used inconsistently for men and women when they have the same credentials, it is a sign of bias and of disrespect.
Further, when titles are used inconsistently in public settings, it perpetuates, however consciously or unconsciously, the notion that women have less value than men and that women do not have to be treated with the same respect as men.
We need to continually be reminded of the ways in which bias and patriarchy have affected the church and us as followers of Christ no matter how progressive we may be.
I often catch myself reacting to a situation from my enculturation instead of my conscious belief system. So I know there is still more work for all of us to do.
May the Spirit give us willingness, awareness, discomfort and courage that we might keep on doing the work of dismantling patriarchy for the sake of ourselves, the faithfulness of our churches to disciple followers of Jesus and the inescapable sexism that saturates the air we breathe.
Meredith Stone serves as executive director of Baptist Women in Ministry.