My wife, Bobbie, died of Alzheimer’s disease earlier this year. While I have been a pastor more than 45 years and have conducted more than 500 funerals, I was not prepared for the grief that overwhelmed me when she died….
My first experience of Ryan Stollar was his cruel suicide note
Note: This article includes an explicit discussion of suicide and mental health issues. In the last 20 years, the words we use to talk about suicide have changed. We are chastised for saying that someone “committed suicide,” because in…
Child liberation theologian R.L. Stollar dies
Child liberation theologian and abuse survivor advocate Ryan L. Stollar died June 28 at age 42. The author, speaker and counselor left a detailed note titled “The End” on his website. According to that note, his death was not an…
Shaving Dad goodbye
His cremation ashes will not be any different because I gave my dad a shave before the funeral home took his body from the house he’d lived in for 47 years. On the surface, logic says a shave before cremation…
Colorizing the SBC’s one-paint-can resolution on euthanasia
Cancer has reduced my father’s robust frame to skin-covered bones. His bombastic voice has deflated to a chirping whisper. But his 84-year-old blue eyes still sparkled when he abruptly made a comment that, to fully appreciate, requires decades of context….
Unearthing an unnecessary death
My wife is in declutter mode, a seasonal psychological disorder similar to photosynthesis. Warming weather and increased hours of sunshine renew her fear that we will die inconveniently for our children, who will be forced to sort mountains of detritus…
A tale of genocide and preschoolers half a world apart
On April 12, the first Sunday after Easter, I led a Sunday school class of little ones through an interactive Stations of the Cross. This was an activity I had done during Holy Week, and a Sunday school teacher loved…
Walk with me, Jesus
It is Easter season in the Christian community and, like many gospel preachers around the world, I have taken as my Sunday texts the stories of the Risen Lord: How he appeared to his friends and followers, and how they…
Good Friday: Empty chairs at empty tables
The morning began the way mornings are supposed to begin. Children arrived with backpacks slung over their shoulders, voices rising and falling in the easy rhythm of laughter and routine. Classrooms filled. Lessons began. It was, in every visible way,…
How to write an obituary
Recently, I heard a radio news story about how people are turning to artificial intelligence to write obituaries for their loved ones when they pass. And I thought to myself, “Writing an obituary isn’t that hard; why do people need…
‘Beautiful, ain’t it?’ Our tragic, magic lives
On Sunday mornings before worship, I check the news to see if there are any new tragic deaths that need to be mentioned. Sometimes I end up writing concerns in the margins of the sermon or the prayers of the…
Why I eat an orange every Christmas
Things were not merry and bright for Edison Cantwell and his five children during the 1932 Christmas season. Christmas was not a welcome time for the Cantwells. Even so, the Christmas of 1932 was going to be a memorable one….