Pewboy is in the driveway washing the mud off his pickup while Altarego witnesses the transformation from the shade. He is trying unsuccessfully to ignore the chatter of his companion.
Pewboy is quite impressed that the South Carolina legislature unanimously approved, and Gov. Mark Sanford allowed to pass into law without his signature, a “Christian license plate.” The license plate, which features a golden cross prominently displayed before a stained glass window, has the words “I Believe” emblazoned across the bottom of the plate.
Pewboy: Yes sir! I hope Virginia gets ‘em before long. Soon as they do I'm marching down to the DMV to get one. Jesus said if we are ashamed of him before men, he will be ashamed of us before the Father. I want to show everybody that I'm not ashamed to be a Christian.
Jim White
Altarego: So, you think you can best do that with a license plate that says “I believe?” Somehow I don't think Jesus had that in mind when he said to take up the cross.
Pewboy: Well, think about many people I meet on the highway every day. I would never have a chance to influence that many people verbally. I can get a license plate and this ol' Ram becomes a rolling gospel tract.
Altarego often finds himself at a loss for words when exchanging ideas with Pewboy but his pause only gives Pewboy a chance to reach for the hose. As the silence lengthened, Pewboy continues.
Pewboy: I bet I know what's bothering you. You're concerned about a cross being right there on a state-issued license plate. Am I right?
Altarego: That certainly comes to mind. To be honest, however, so much about that bothers me that I hardly know where to begin. First of all, I know how you drive. The thought of you having a license plate that displays a cross and says “I believe” worries me. I suspect you might do the kingdom more harm than good.
Pewboy: What are you saying? That I'm not a good driver? I may be a type-A personality behind the wheel, but I've never been involved in an accident.
Altarego: Not unless you count the ones you caused! What do you think it will do for your witness when the guy who runs the minivan off the road has a cross on his license plate? [Pewboy scowled at his companion] OK, I exaggerate. But when you are exceeding the speed limit or driving aggressively — as I have known you to do — what kind of witness it that?
Pewboy: Hmm. But, it's a matter of free speech. Christians ought to be allowed to declare our faith!
Altarego: And that has to be on a license plate? You can put a fish on your tailgate, a Christian slogan on your bumper, a Virginia Baptist Mission Board sticker on your rear window and advertise your church with license plate frame. You can even paint a cross on the side of your truck! And if that isn't enough, you can get a vanity plate that says N2HIM or something like that. Why would Christians need another way to exercise their freedom of speech?
Pewboy: Well, why not? In South Carolina you can get a license plate with a duck on it for Ducks Unlimited or a turkey for Wild Turkey Federation members. About every college in the state has its own plate along with a lot of sororities and fraternities. Golfers have a couple of options and Nascar fans have five drivers to choose from. You can already get a plate that says “In God We Trust,” so the secular humanists of the Low Country organized and got a plate that says “In Reason We Trust.”
Altarego: That would be the same secular humanism that the Supreme Court ruled is a religion?
Pewboy: Well, they didn't limit it to the Low Country, but yes. You see, South Carolina has already allowed religion to be on their license plates, so what would the cross hurt?
Altarego: I must admit you've given me something to think about. Let me ask you something. If a Jewish man or a Muslim woman — or for that matter a Hindu or a Wiccan — wanted a license plate with their symbol and a slogan would you be in favor of it?
Pewboy: Whoa! Well …. I guess so. I guess they could get their own if they wanted to.
Altarego: Actually, no and yes. According to the action of the legislature only the cross will be offered. A Jew does not have the option of having a star of David license plate or a Muslim a crescent. The others could, and no doubt would, petition the legislature to allow a license plate to be offered to their group as well. But with the political pressure that would surely be put on legislators by some of their Christian constituents — who constitute a vast majority — would it pass into law? That's anybody's guess.
Pewboy: I must admit that doesn't seem fair. But then again, it doesn't seem fair that every other group can get its own license plate. Why shouldn't Christians? In Virginia you have 180 to choose from. If you are a mason, or a greyhound lover or a friend of Tibet, there's a license plate for you.
To tell you the truth, I think its gotten ridiculous. The only reason the states let these groups put their logo on license plates is because they pay good money. The states, including our Commonwealth, have discovered the space on their license plates to be a great source of income.
Why it wouldn't surprise me if we don't see regular ads on the plates. I can see it now — a plate with a Goody's Headache Powder logo and the words, “Take the pain out of traffic jams.”
Altarego: [Ignoring the last comment] I think you've put your finger on a big part of the problem. When a state government sells ad space on its license plates, and a religious entity wishes to buy the space and displays its logo, does it violate the separation of church and state? For that matter, if the state refused to give approval for religious plates to be offered when other organizations have them, would it violate their rights?
Pewboy: Now you're getting the idea.
Altarego: Let's assume for the moment that all other religions could get their own symbols and slogans on license plates. Is that what we really want? Aren't we polarized enough already? Do we really want people dividing even more over religion?
I have an even better idea, though. What if we Christians demonstrate our belief in God by how we treat other people — on the road and off — rather than by declaring our faith on a license plate?
Pewboy: Hmm. That might even lessen road rage.