Baptist News Global
Sections
  • News
  • Analysis
  • Opinion
  • Curated
  • Storytelling
    • Faith & Justice >
      • Charleston: Metanoia with Bill Stanfield
      • Charlotte: QC Family Tree with Greg and Helms Jarrell
      • Little Rock: Judge Wendell Griffen
      • North Carolina: Conetoe
    • Welcoming the Stranger >
      • Lost Boys of Sudan: St. John’s Baptist Charlotte
      • Awakening to Immigrant Justice: Myers Park Baptist Church
      • Hospitality on the corner: Gaston Christian Center
    • Signature Ministries >
      • Jake Hall: Gospel Gothic, Music and Radio
    • Singing Our Faith >
      • Hymns for a Lifetime: Ken Wilson and Knollwood Baptist Church
      • Norfolk Street Choir
    • Resilient Rural America >
      • Alabama: Perry County
      • Texas: Hidalgo County
      • Arkansas Delta
      • Southeast Kentucky
  • More
    • Contact
    • About
    • Donate
    • Planned Giving
    • Letters to the Editor
    • Advertising
    • Ministry Jobs and More
    • Transitions
    • Subscribe
    • Submissions and Permissions
Donate Subscribe
Search Search this site

The room where it happens

OpinionRob Dyer  |  October 22, 2021

If you’re familiar with the Broadway musical Hamilton, then you’ve probably heard the song “You’ll Be Back.” Sung by the character of King George III, this song is a sharp shift in style and tone from the rest of the show and serves to remind the colonists that their attempted revolution inevitably will be just a passing phase. Because, of course, as the king reminds, they’ll be back; he can’t imagine they won’t.

It wasn’t until this past week that I was struck by the irony of just how tragically perfect that song is for this time.

Rob Dyer

Think about it: an authority, who thinks he’s in touch with his people, sweetly sings a song of truth to remind them, compel them, threaten them to return. Assured they will, he recites with disdain their reasons for distancing and counters each one with his own version of reality. As we know, the colonists did not come back. The revolution went forward. And those who once were citizens survived, nay, thrived without the home they once knew.

Living within the collective trauma of the pandemic, many people have stepped back from their churches. One of the responses from church leaders has been to lament decreased attendance, volunteer shortages, emptier rooms and reduced giving. While the message of such a response might be conveyed with a mindfulness of people needing the church, the motivation is not without the awareness that the church needs the people, too. How will we survive without their offerings?

This may sound harsh, but we are dangerously close to thinking of the people as numbers and seat-fillers we need — barely a step above property.

While we aren’t pulling a full King George III impersonation here with violent threats, there has been disdain. Expressions of frustration and disappointment with people have been shared in a multitude of ways including (but not limited to) passive-aggressive “invitations” in weekly church emails, non-specific but pointed social media posts, and maybe even face-to-face. I’ve seen it, my colleagues have seen it and, in the end, such a stance with our stanzas will probably produce the same result as that tired king: They won’t come back.

“This may sound harsh, but we are dangerously close to thinking of the people as numbers and seat-fillers we need — barely a step above property.”

In working to figure out this reality in my own context, here’s where I’ve landed: Collective lamenting has its place.

Ever since publishing my column “They’re Not Coming Back,” I’ve been overwhelmed with emails, phone calls and social media interactions with church leaders from around the nation who are feeling the pains, fears and confusion of this situation. To be honest, it was so humbling and healing for me simply to be heard and know that I am not alone.

But we can’t sit in the land of doom and gloom forever because the gospel is bigger than all this. The world still desperately needs a church that shows up where the people are, even if the people aren’t where we are.

In part one of “They’re Not Coming Back,” I shared three steps for addressing this new reality of absent individuals:

  • We need to stop telling stories we know are not true.
  • We need to see this situation for what it is.
  • We need to understand why.

It’s with this last one that I’d like to springboard into a more specific idea every church in every town can do next: We need to become spiritual trauma centers for our communities.

What it means to become a spiritual trauma center

In many circles, “spiritual trauma center” is a term used for organizations that are trying to help people recover from unhealthy church experiences or other religious trauma. When I use this term, I am more generally speaking of the way we can reframe the role of the church in any community to address trauma from a spiritual perspective.

The church is called to see the real pains of the human condition and then to offer the good news in response, with hopeful reframing and merciful actions. When we do this well, we become a spiritual trauma center for the everyday and the extreme situations of life (like, let’s say, a global pandemic.) Trauma-informed ministry teaches us that we are interacting with wounded people who need help reframing the narrative of how they see themselves in the world and in the image of Christ.

“Trauma-informed ministry teaches us that we are interacting with wounded people who need help reframing the narrative of how they see themselves in the world and in the image of Christ.”

What it does not mean

We cannot approach this work with secret goals of increasing membership, attendance or giving. Our goal should be to help heal the wounded and show them a path that leads to life abundant.

This means the answer to the collective trauma of the pandemic is probably not found in simply attending our worship services. Our worship services can be good and important, but they aren’t so great that all the world needs is 52 Sundays of perfect attendance to experience real healing and wholeness.

Hosea 6:6 and Matthew 9:13 teach us that God desires us to be agents of mercy more than robots of ritual. If we succeeded in bringing all the people back to regular worship, weekly serving roles and consistent giving, but never helped them heal from the spiritual trauma of the pandemic, that would just be “noisy gong and clanging cymbal” ministry. Sure, our seats would be filled. But then when they return to all the other seats they fill every other day of the week, how will they be doing, really?

How to be agents of mercy

First, get everyone in your congregation their own “agent of mercy” cape. They’ll blow everyone away as they walk through town, ready to care for others.

Actually, the first thing to do is recognize your unique setting and context and consider where you can start. Not everyone in your congregation is ready — or able — to take these steps. And that’s OK.

“The first thing to do is recognize your unique setting and context and consider where you can start.”

The encouraging news is you don’t need everyone to start doing this work. In fact, none of the steps to becoming a spiritual trauma center require that you get your church’s permission before trying. And nobody is forced to participate (of course.) But the offering of what you’re about to endeavor to try will, hopefully, start to impact in ways so that others are drawn to be a part. It also should be noted that the more people who engage in this work, the more likely you’ll find yourself leading a church that is a spiritual trauma center for your community.

Practical Step No. 1: Learn to listen for people’s particular pains.

When you talk with people, whether an estranged member or someone new who you want to reach, actively listen to what they are experiencing and don’t worry about a response. When people talk about what life is like for them now, don’t try to solve the problem or give your own examples. Just listen to people with the hope that you will learn something and maybe even be changed by what they share. There is healing in being heard and wisdom in listening.

Taking notes while you are listening to people can be awkward unless you are chatting over the phone. So, as soon as you wrap up talking with someone, give yourself time to make notes on what you heard and think deeply about what they have shared with you.

“There is healing in being heard and wisdom in listening.”

If you are in tune with the needs of real people, then your prayerful discernments for the actions of your ministry will be better grounded in the actual human condition, the actual pains of the people. You have an answer for these pains in the next two steps. When the timing is right, trust that the Spirit will guide you in sharing this answer.

Checkpoint No. 1 to becoming a spiritual trauma center: Do you know the particular pains of the people you are trying to reach?

Practical Step No. 2: Be ready to articulate the benefits of following Jesus.

How many of us can actually articulate the benefits of following Jesus? When the people in pain open their minds and their hearts, do we just offer a series of wonderful worship services and programs? I hope not. I hope we find a way to fully articulate how Jesus has become the spiritual cure in our own lives — and can be in theirs, too.

As I type this, I know how ridiculously basic and simple this seems, but each of us needs an elevator speech. Each of us needs that 30-second “here’s why my life is better with Jesus” snapshot that explains why we’re different and life is different because of him. And then we need to have the deeper version for when someone asks for more.

“Can you genuinely explain the benefits of following Jesus in a way that is 100% authentic to your experience of life?”

Let’s be honest, most of our churches are filled with people who cannot do this. If both the leaders and the people cannot express why the good news is good, then does it really surprise us that connections with the church have grown so thin amidst all the terrible, very bad news that has monopolized almost every facet of our lives over the last 18 months?

Checkpoint No. 2 to becoming a spiritual trauma center: Can you genuinely explain the benefits of following Jesus in a way that is 100% authentic to your experience of life?

Practical Step No. 3: Invite the people into a generosity of steadfast love.

If we can find ourselves in church communities where both the pains of life and the benefits of the gospel are known, this next step should be easy: Start inviting people to join you in loving others.

Someone you know needs help. Go help them. Take someone with you. And experience firsthand how those physical, mental and emotional pains you learned about during step No. 1 begin to heal through acts of steadfast love from people of faith.

The collective trauma of the pandemic has been predominantly fueled by a lack of connection with others. People need people. And those needs aren’t met solely through a Sunday morning hour or Wednesday night dinner within our church walls. Such an expression of love responding to such a deep need will overflow into the streets of the surrounding neighborhoods and beyond time frames of convenience.

“We have got to start loving people so extravagantly that they ask us why we are doing it.”

We have got to start loving people so extravagantly that they ask us why we are doing it. And it will be in those moments that we will get to tell them about Jesus. Because he loves in these ways. And when we know and follow him, we can’t help but do the same.

Checkpoint No. 3 to becoming a spiritual trauma center: Are you loving people in extravagant ways with the help of other people?

Millions of people have seen the Broadway musical Hamilton. This means millions of people have heard the out-of-touch leader who’s too proud to acknowledge the needs of his people and instead continues offering solutions for problems they don’t have, eventually losing them for good.

Yet, in the second act of Hamilton, another song is sung. This one by a new kind of leader who simply wants to be in “The Room Where It Happens.” This leader wants to have a role in the important things. He wants to be a part of that which makes a lasting difference in the lives of the people.

There is a god of attendance that can demand our attention. There is a god of giving and a god of doing-what-we’ve-always-done that can drive our actions too. But then there’s the God of love. Our God sees pain, weeps with those who weep, offers healing truth, loves deeply and invites us to do the same.

Our God is not worried about how many seats are filled on a Sunday. Our God is wondering how many hearts will be seen and served by the people of God. If we choose this God of love in our churches, then I imagine many others will want to be in the room where it happens.

Rob Dyer serves as senior pastor at First United Presbyterian Church of Belleville, Ill. He has spent the last several years working in the areas of community missions and leadership development in Southern Illinois, where he lives with his brilliant and supportive wife, Sarah, and their four children. He also serves as lead consultant with Ministry Architects, where this column originally was published.

 

Related articles:

They’re not coming back | Opinion by Rob Dyer

It may take 21 Sundays, but I will get back to church | Opinion by Nora Lozano

What we missed most about in-person church, what’s coming back and what’s likely to change

In ‘Hamilton,’ King George has Calvin on his side | Opinion by Rick Pidcock


OPINION: Views expressed in Baptist News Global columns and commentaries are solely those of the authors.
Tags:ChurchattendanceParticipationHamiltonCOVID-19post-pandemicRob DyerRoom where it happensreturning to church
More by
Rob Dyer
  • Get BNG headlines in your inbox

  • BNG dinner will bring together Anthea Butler and Beth Allison Barr for a conversation on race and gender

    Two of the most prominent voices speaking to the American church about race and gender will appear together at the Baptist News Global dinner during the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship’s General Assembly in Dallas this June. Get your tickets now!

  • Featured

    • SBC plans to release list of known sexual abusers in churches, refutes its own former general counsel

      News

    • Who is Augie Boto, the central figure in the SBC sexual abuse cover up?

      News

    • Remember the women: The Southern Baptist cover up of sexual abuse

      Opinion

    • This is more than just sin

      Opinion


    Curated

    • After 2,000 UK Church Buildings Close, New Church Plants Get Creative

      After 2,000 UK Church Buildings Close, New Church Plants Get Creative

      May 25, 2022
    • Many Jewish World War II Soldiers Had Christian Burials. That’s Changing.

      Many Jewish World War II Soldiers Had Christian Burials. That’s Changing.

      May 25, 2022
    • House Speaker Nancy Pelosi Questions Archbishop’s Decision Regarding Communion Ban

      House Speaker Nancy Pelosi Questions Archbishop’s Decision Regarding Communion Ban

      May 25, 2022
    • Burka Enforcement and Burka Bans: Where Extremist Policies Meet

      Burka Enforcement and Burka Bans: Where Extremist Policies Meet

      May 25, 2022
    Read Next:

    SBC report shows how five words turn abuse victim from ‘survivor’ to ‘whore’

    OpinionMarv Knox

    More Articles

    • All
    • News
    • Opinion
    • Curated
    • What happens when the good news of therapy and the good news of Scripture conflict?

      OpinionRebecca Hewitt-Newson

    • Sick of war, church leaders in South Sudan recommit to finding peace

      NewsAnthony Akaeze

    • White supremacy and firearm idolatry: America’s Baal

      OpinionBill Leonard, Senior Columnist

    • The European option: Why we need a third way on abortion

      AnalysisAlan Bean

    • After the Guidepost report: Dwelling with evil while living into hope

      OpinionKathy Manis Findley

    • SBC establishes hotline to receive reports of sexual abuse in churches

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • SBC presidential candidate says Executive Committee’s waiver of attorney-client privilege was ‘not wise’

      NewsDavid Bumgardner

    • Rights, responsibilities and the two-fold commandment of love: A reflection on gun violence in America

      OpinionGreg Garrett, Senior Columnist

    • Mass murder and the soundtrack of our lives

      OpinionJustin Cox

    • Letter to the Editor: Where are the repentant SBC leaders?

      OpinionLetters to the Editor

    • What I learned listening to others who have left the faith

      AnalysisRick Pidcock

    • United Methodist model could help Southern Baptists recover from sexual abuse scandal

      AnalysisCynthia Astle

    • Who is Augie Boto, the central figure in the SBC sexual abuse cover up?

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • This is more than just sin

      OpinionMeredith Stone

    • Remember the women: The Southern Baptist cover up of sexual abuse

      OpinionPam Durso

    • Becoming UNSTOPPABLE Christians

      Paid Promoted Content

    • SBC plans to release list of known sexual abusers in churches, refutes its own former general counsel

      NewsDavid Bumgardner, Jeff Brumley, Mark Wingfield and Maina Mwaura

    • Don’t overlook the depth of the disease in the SBC

      OpinionPaula Garrett

    • On three-month anniversary of Russian invasion, Ukrainian Baptists and neighbors keep helping everyone they can

      NewsJeff Brumley

    • Tear down the SBC Executive Committee and replace it

      OpinionLayne Wallace

    • While SBC weeps over sexual abuse allegations, the TheoBros take on Beth Allison Barr one more time

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • It’s time to stop giving Christianity a pass on white supremacy and violence

      OpinionRobert P. Jones

    • SBC’s former law firm sharply disagrees with Sexual Abuse Task Force report

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • Ministry jobs and more

      NewsBarbara Francis

    • SBC report shows how five words turn abuse victim from ‘survivor’ to ‘whore’

      OpinionMarv Knox

    • Sick of war, church leaders in South Sudan recommit to finding peace

      NewsAnthony Akaeze

    • SBC establishes hotline to receive reports of sexual abuse in churches

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • SBC presidential candidate says Executive Committee’s waiver of attorney-client privilege was ‘not wise’

      NewsDavid Bumgardner

    • Who is Augie Boto, the central figure in the SBC sexual abuse cover up?

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • SBC plans to release list of known sexual abusers in churches, refutes its own former general counsel

      NewsDavid Bumgardner, Jeff Brumley, Mark Wingfield and Maina Mwaura

    • On three-month anniversary of Russian invasion, Ukrainian Baptists and neighbors keep helping everyone they can

      NewsJeff Brumley

    • While SBC weeps over sexual abuse allegations, the TheoBros take on Beth Allison Barr one more time

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • SBC’s former law firm sharply disagrees with Sexual Abuse Task Force report

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • Ministry jobs and more

      NewsBarbara Francis

    • Hearing from victims’ families changed the death penalty debate in Connecticut

      NewsJeff Brumley

    • What’s next for recommendations and reforms in SBC sexual abuse study?

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • Guidepost report documents pattern of ignoring, denying and deflecting on sexual abuse claims in SBC

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • Author considers how to mourn what’s lost when the faithful leave church

      NewsJeff Brumley

    • As joblessness rocks South Africa, fake pastor diplomas are in demand

      NewsRay Mwareya and Nyasha Bhobo

    • Why breaking up is so hard to do for United Methodists: Connectionalism

      NewsCynthia Astle

    • Oklahoma legislators say life begins at ‘fertilization’

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • Baptists in Ukraine continue their humanitarian work amid devastation

      NewsJeff Brumley

    • Louisville police training quoted Bible verse to say officers are God’s agents of wrath

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • Transitions for the week of 5-20-22

      NewsBarbara Francis

    • ‘It’s still the economy, stupid’

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • Pennsylvania Baptist church licenses transgender man for ministry

      NewsJeff Brumley

    • Buffalo massacre is more evidence of white Christian nationalism, sociologists say

      NewsJeff Brumley

    • Displaced by the war in Ukraine, some African students battle to continue their education in Germany

      NewsAnthony Akaeze

    • Does the Johnson Amendment have any teeth left?

      NewsMark Wingfield

    • Ministry jobs and more

      NewsBarbara Francis

    • What happens when the good news of therapy and the good news of Scripture conflict?

      OpinionRebecca Hewitt-Newson

    • White supremacy and firearm idolatry: America’s Baal

      OpinionBill Leonard, Senior Columnist

    • After the Guidepost report: Dwelling with evil while living into hope

      OpinionKathy Manis Findley

    • Rights, responsibilities and the two-fold commandment of love: A reflection on gun violence in America

      OpinionGreg Garrett, Senior Columnist

    • Mass murder and the soundtrack of our lives

      OpinionJustin Cox

    • Letter to the Editor: Where are the repentant SBC leaders?

      OpinionLetters to the Editor

    • This is more than just sin

      OpinionMeredith Stone

    • Remember the women: The Southern Baptist cover up of sexual abuse

      OpinionPam Durso

    • Don’t overlook the depth of the disease in the SBC

      OpinionPaula Garrett

    • Tear down the SBC Executive Committee and replace it

      OpinionLayne Wallace

    • It’s time to stop giving Christianity a pass on white supremacy and violence

      OpinionRobert P. Jones

    • SBC report shows how five words turn abuse victim from ‘survivor’ to ‘whore’

      OpinionMarv Knox

    • Former foster youth need to know they are not abandoned

      OpinionAlbert L. Reyes

    • What I learned about Polish hospitality toward Ukrainians: There but for the grace of God

      OpinionPatrick Wilson

    • Stop using Jesus to disguise your predatory patriarchy

      OpinionJessica Abell and Stephany Rose Spaulding

    • Sadly, I agree that a complementarian seminary shouldn’t offer women degrees in pastoral theology

      OpinionAnna Sieges

    • Intolerable cruelty is killing us

      OpinionKris Aaron

    • Another racist mass shooting and our failure to tend Jesus’ sheep

      OpinionEmily Holladay

    • Learning about change from Henry Ford

      OpinionBob Newell

    • Hymn stories: ‘Christ is alive! Let Christians sing’

      OpinionBeverly A. Howard

    • Gifts of hospitality in the midst of grief

      OpinionSara Robb-Scott

    • Bubba-Doo’s gets a new sign

      OpinionCharles Qualls

    • Conservative or liberal? Jesus widens our political landscape

      OpinionRussell Waldrop

    • Letter to the Editor: A response to Laura Ellis on abortion and Christian Realism

      OpinionLetters to the Editor

    • The Beloved Community and the heresy of white replacement: How ‘Beyoncé Mass’ gave me hope after the Buffalo massacre

      OpinionRobert P. Jones

    • After 2,000 UK Church Buildings Close, New Church Plants Get Creative

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Many Jewish World War II Soldiers Had Christian Burials. That’s Changing.

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • House Speaker Nancy Pelosi Questions Archbishop’s Decision Regarding Communion Ban

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Burka Enforcement and Burka Bans: Where Extremist Policies Meet

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Climate Change Indicators Reach Record Levels

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • The Catholic Church’s views on exorcism have changed – a religious studies scholar explains why

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Indiana pastor admits ‘adultery’; woman says she was a teen

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Church of Scotland Approves Same-Sex Marriage

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBob Allen and Jeff Brumley

    • Banned from Communion in San Francisco, Pelosi receives Eucharist in Washington

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Senior Israeli lawmaker warns of “religious war” over Jerusalem moves

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Minnesota GOP apologizes for Soros puppetmaster video

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • If the media are reluctant to properly label the GOP’s racist, Christian nationalist ideologies, we’ll have trouble hanging on to democracy

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Pope voices hope church in China can operate in freedom

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Telehealth abortion demand is soaring. But access may come down to where you live

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • With AIPAC funding primary campaigns, young Jewish progressives move further left

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Welsh First Minister ‘regrets’ that Franklin Graham is coming to Wales

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Willow Creek announces major layoffs amid post-COVID struggle

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Ohio House passes bill requiring colleges give students 3 days of absences for religious observation

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • ‘Conversion therapy’ ban falls short in Minnesota Senate

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Don’t buy Alito’s assurances: here’s what happens next after Roe falls

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Leading Psychologist Bridges Trauma Healing and the Black Church

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • For some people, religious leaders might be most effective at communicating the importance of COVID-19 vaccination

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Former pastor in 2 states pleads guilty to child sex charges

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • A rabbi who ‘speaks to Christians’ condemned them on Twitter. It cost him his job.

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    • Deadly explosion damages historic church, Baptist offices in Cuba

      Curated

      Exclude from home pageBNG staff

    Conversations that Matter.

    © 2022 Baptist News Global. All rights reserved.

    Want to share a story? We hope you will! Read our republishing, terms of use and privacy policies here.

    • Facebook
    • Twitter
    • Instagram
    • LinkedIn
    • RSS